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Negotiation to gain consent is one of the
cornerstones of SM activities. This requires an understanding of yourself and
your desires, and an understanding that these desires are mutable and may change
with your moods, stresses of your daily life/etc. Many people use extensive checklists
to negotiate their scenes. Others who are more clear about what they want and
have the ability to communicate clearly will be able to negotiate well without
such lists. Sit down with your parner(s) and discuss your desires and
interests. Then as an exercise, take some time to learn to say "no"
to certain requests. Being sex positive is not about saying yes all the time. Is
is also about saying "I'm bit interested," and having that heeded. Without
this fundamental basis of consent, SM activities can cross the line to abusive
behavior.
Related articles:
BDSM vs ABUSE?
SCC: Safe, Sane and Consensual
Power Play
Related articles:
BDSM vs ABUSE?
SCC: Safe, Sane and Consensual
Power Play
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